


Won't Let You Go

by Xeiana



Category: Kamen Rider Drive
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst and Feels, M/M, Open to Interpretation, Possible Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-13
Updated: 2015-09-13
Packaged: 2018-04-20 12:28:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4787294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xeiana/pseuds/Xeiana
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gou never expected Chase to save him. The other should have saved himself, after everything he had put him through. He said he had been just a fling - that their nights together had meant nothing, but he was wrong, he had been scared to admit his feelings except in those heated moments in bed. And now… He reached out for the shuddering core of Chase’s. He didn’t want to let go, not now!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Won't Let You Go

**Author's Note:**

> Open ending because I am terrible. I did have an ending planned, buuuut... I decided to torture you all with not writing it. I waited until Tv-Nihon added their subtitles to watch the subbed version and match this up with it more or less. My shipping feels had reached an all-time high when watching it and it just kills me. It was supposed to be up here the previous day, but I had to sleep due to work. But I worked on it more to make it even better because of that, so enjoy!

Gou couldn’t watch as Chase’s axe, stolen from the other’s very hands, came swinging down. He turned his head, pressing his cheek into the rough gravel and waited for the end. There was no more strength in him to even move, let alone fight back.

_‘Kiriko, Shinnosuke... Chase… I’m… I’m sorry.’_

The sound of the axe swinging down terrified the rider, yet he steeled himself, not wanting to show weakness to his bastard of a father. Dimly, blood rushing in his ears, he heard Chase yell his name. His heartbeat stuttered at that. He never got a chance to say… The end never came, hearing something block the blow. It wasn’t just one, it was three times, metal grating against metal in a sickening way. A pained grunt cut through all other noise, alerting that someone had gotten in the way… But who…? Opening his eyes hesitantly, he stared up at the black and purple figure. Mashin Chaser?

“Chase!” His heart plummeted. Why did that stupid Roidmude get in the way? Why did he try and save him? He was only going to get himself killed and… Killed. He swore his heart stopped beating as he recalled a sentence that the other had asked, one that had gone unanswered.

_“Is that what a real buddy acts like?”_

Like what Hayase did, overcoming his knee injury to help his former partner when they were all in need, Chase was going to protect him no matter what, while he was lying prone from previous injuries. No, no no NO _NO_! Trying to sit up, to find Dead Heat and henshin, to help out and not let what he dreaded happen, he suddenly froze. Gou stared upwards as Chase grunted with the effort of holding the Shingou Axe in place between his neck and shoulder, one arm straining. Banno yelled in frustration, screaming how the other was a useless - _no, Gou thought, he is far from useless!_ \- pile of scraps and should have destroyed. The axe slipped from Chase’s hand, slicing into his chest and deeper, far deeper.

“Agh!” The cry of pain stabbed his heart as he reached out, eyes widening in disbelief. Before Banno could dare to attack again, Break Gunner fired into his chest several times in succession and repelled Banno, sending him flying away into a wall. Gasping, Chase’s Mashin Chaser form shattered apart, the Roidmude hunching over with a hand to his stomach, eyes wide and unfocused. Electricity sparked around his body as he straightened, but something was off. Chase convulsed slightly, going still for a split second before his legs collapsed, falling backwards with no indication that he could catch himself.

“Hey!” Gou caught Chase, preventing the other from hitting the ground like a lifeless ragdoll. Gripping his shoulder tight with one hand, the other fluttered over his chest, taking notice of the burns and smoke that spanned its surface. He began to tremble, not because of his own pain, but because of the condition of the robo- no… of the _man_ in his arms.

“No way…” He couldn’t think, barely could breathe. This all happened because he believed he could take Banno on by himself, even when wounded so greatly earlier. If he wasn’t so cocky, so arrogant, so like his _father_ and just let someone help him for once… If he only let go of his pride and _break for one goddamn second_ and think things through, this could have been avoided. He paused, taking a shuddering breath that did absolutely nothing to calm him down. It was his fault. That was the biggest slap in the face he could have ever received, more than his sister slapping him for being so irrational, more than being told he was the worst experiment of his father’s.

“What are you doing?!” _That should have been me there, I should have taken that blow, not you. Please…. Not you._ Those thoughts kept running through his head, inflicting pain far greater than his injuries could ever hope to accomplish. He shook the other rider, as if by shaking him, he would get an answer faster, that the other would brush this devastating injury off like nothing, like he always did. Chase had always been stronger than him, not letting any injuries slow him down and never forgot his sense of justice. Slowly, the unfocused expression cleared in Chase’s eyes, pushing past the pain that spread through every inch of his body so he could look at the man he protected, that he…

“It’s fine, Gou. As long as I… protected someone important to me… I have no regrets.” Those words broke the younger rider, unable to stifle the sudden sob from slipping through his lips. Someone important… Oh god Chase, why?

_‘I’m no one important. I treated you like trash, pretended like I didn’t have feelings for you when I did. I kept pushing you away when all you wanted was for me to be happy, so you let me do as I wished. Why didn’t you ever tell me to stop, that you were mistaken, that you didn’t love me like you said you did? WHY CHASE? Why… Why…. W-why didn’t I stop? I made you miserable and you held your head high through it, and now…. You’ll die thinking I don’t care. But I… I do.’_

Parting his mouth to say something, to say anything, to apologize for everything he had done, to reveal that yes he did fuck up and didn’t deserve this, and just _get the truth out before he was too late damnit!_ But… Feeling the other take his hand with his own shaking one, he glanced down, stifling another sob with clenching teeth. Two items were placed into his hand, Signal Chaser and Chase’s license. Why was he giving them to him? Confusion evident in his eyes, he turned his gaze back to Chase, trying to see through tears that just wouldn’t stop flowing no matter how hard he blinked them away.

“I know you never considered me anything other than a Roidmude… But those nights,” Chase gasped as he flinched in pain, feeling the core inside of him burning out of control. Through the agony, he still could clearly see the tortured look on Gou’s face, “they made me feel the closest to being human. Like I meant something to someone.” At the strangled sound that came from the other, his eyes slowly moved to meet his, taking in the tears that still flowed down those cheeks. Gou was still crying. He tilted his head slightly, eyes squinting in an attempt to wonder why the other was doing so. Too many times he had threatened to both kill him and love him, leaving him unable to decipher what was his true view of him.

“These are the treasures my human friends gave me.” Human friends… Everyone except for him of course, with how he treated him, flip-flopping how he acted day and night without a care. Now, only _now_ , could Gou see so clearly how badly the other wanted to be like a human, to feel the way they do, _understand_ them, to have a purpose rather than being an experiment that had been brainwashed so many times, rewritten and repurposed to suit the needs of others.

“It’d be a waste if they burned up with me.” Speaking of his impending death so calmly was heartbreaking, as if he had decided what he would have done before hand. His jaw clenched, remembering when he had noticed his injury beforehand and tried to talk him down from fighting on the front line. Holding in a cry of pain as the memory replayed in his mind, Gou could not stop from hating himself. Why was it every time they interacted, it always went wrong? He buried his forehead in Chase’s hair, form shaking due to his silent sobs, fingers closing around the precious items. Something warm cupped his cheek, just a light touch that easily could have gone unnoticed. Unable to stop from flinching back, Gou’s eyes widened when he realized it was Chase’s hand.

The other never let his hand leave the other’s face, staring up him silent as ever, but there in his eyes dwelled several emotions. They were the same faint glimmers Gou had caught during those nights, even in glances when the other thought he hadn’t been paying attention. Chase’s lips thinned, indicating he wanted to say something, but Gou closed his eyes, leaning into the warmth of his palm as a strangled breath left him, jaw trembling with effort to keep the sobs in. He didn’t trust himself to keep himself from completely breaking down if Chase said anything, only hope that maybe… maybe this action could convey what he just couldn’t say.

Chase’s eyebrows furrowed at the action before he began to relax, an emotion welling up deep within his chest, one he knew the name of. A grimace soon spread across his face as he felt his core burning out of control, sending his body convulsing in Gou’s arms. The latter’s eyes snapped open, staring down at him with a mix of emotions that left him trying to decipher each one.

A sound caught the Roidmude’s ear, eyes snapping over to where Banno had been thrown and widening with what he saw. Not giving any time for either men to react, Chase pushed Gou to the side, heaving himself upwards despite his failing body’s protest. Grunting, the rider rushed towards Banno, feeling the backlash of energy begin to crackle across his body, core shuddering each time it shocked him.

_‘Protect the humans.’_

The programming that was firmly implemented within Chase was absolute, but even without having been destined to always protect them, to guard them from harm… He would have anyway. To protect their smiles, their laughter, their happiness. Reaching out, Chase held Banno around the waist, using all of his dwindling strength to keep him still for the inevitable explosion that would soon follow.

_‘Protect Gou.’_

Grunting, Chase’s eyes closed, baring his teeth in pain as Banno tried to get him off. His body felt as if he was burning, the energy building up inside him and just waiting for a chance to explode. Gou cried out from behind him, trying to crawl over, to do _something_ to help him. The Roidmude would have laughed if he knew how. Gou had already saved him from Banno’s attack before and now… Now this was his turn.

“Chase!” The tortured tone of Gou made Chase move his head to one side, in one last effort to catch sight of the other rider. The sight of those outstretched fingers, the way Gou tried to still move, to stop him. He closed his eyes. A purple glow emitted from his body, energy crackling around him until… The explosion rocked the room and the building above, Banno’s cry of pain and anguish echoing after it. Gou threw up his arm to block the fire and smoke, feeling something pelt his skin and jacket, Chase’s special items safe in his jacket pocket. That was when he heard it…

Nothing. There was no sound. Terror spreading through his body, adrenaline rushing through his system like jet fuel. Pushing himself forward, half-crawling half-stumbling, he blindly fought to get to where Chase had been, blinded almost by the thick smoke. Tripping over his own two feet and landing hard on his shoulder, he could see something begin to move. Chase!? His heart fluttered for a moment, waiting with bated breath to see if the other hadn’t blown up, that he hadn’t…

It wasn’t him, but his core, just floating there.

_‘No… Please no.’_

It was as if a pit opened up and devoured him. He knew what came next after the body of a Roidmude blowing up. For someone who had killed so many Roidmudes already, it was painfully clear what was going to happen.

“No, I won’t let you go…” Despite the pain that threatened to overwhelm, to send him deep into the cold abyss of unconsciousness, he reached his hand up, fingers trembling. Chase’s core slowly began to rise as purple energy flickered across it, similar to how it did to his body before the explosion. His breath hitched, tears once more blurring his sight, yet the core still remained visible to him. To prevent it from rising too high, too far for him to reach out and hold on to, his fingers curled around the middle of the core.

A scream echoed through the crumbling building. It took him a second to realize it was his own, and a few more for the cause of why he screamed. Pain. Searing hot pain, hotter than the explosion, than the burns and wounds on him, raced down from his hand. It was agonizing, sending him into a spasm as his muscles pleaded for him to let go, to save his body from this torment. Yet there was no part of his mind that would ever think to go through with such an action.

Was this what a Roidmude felt before? Was this what their death was like?

He couldn’t let go, not with those last words Chase left him with. Gladly would he be incinerated in this inferno if it meant he could save Chase in turn, to right the wrongs he had committed. If he could, he would have turned back time. Gou gasped for air, opening eyes he didn’t think he closed to stare up at the core. 000. It was struggling, as if Chase was trying to get away from him, to prevent him from getting hurt in the explosion his core would create when shattering.

_NO!_

With determination blocking the pain and new-found strength hardening his weakened body, Gou rose to his knees. Bringing his other hand to cradle the core to his chest, he shivered involuntarily at the crackling energy. The feel of the burning hot core, of the way it stilled against his breast for a moment, seemingly torn between getting away or leaning closer, it tore at his heart. A strangled noise slipped through clenched teeth despite him trying to hold it in, to not let the other know how badly broken he was inside. If Chase’s core broke in front of him, he was unsure if he would ever recover from that.

_‘I’m sorry – I love you – I’m sorry – I love YOU – I’M SORRY! I LO-’_

The chant he screamed in his mind finally stopped, three words leaving his lips, overflowing with raw emotion that could not be stemmed as his heart clenched in his chest.

“I love you.”

The core began to glow a searing purple, so bright he had to shut his eyes, yet his fingers only tightened on the shuddering core that continued to fight its way out of his hand. He screamed as the light washed over him, overwhelming both his senses and mind.

“Chase.”


End file.
